Thursday, July 27, 2006

Humor : My tech desire...

My Tech Desire :

At any given point of time, every body has one or other desire. For example, at this very moment, aren’t you, the reader of this article, desperately desire – not to read this piece of ‘yet another scrape’…?

OK, I will tell you alternately. Isn’t it is your desire, that is making your breath in and out constantly? But I am different. I am dying to have a kinda all-in-one gadget that must have capability to do almost all my work, and many more for others! (Yes, it must have true scalability and upgradeability!)

I will definitely call it i-Mob (‘i’ is cool and successful as it is in ‘i-pod’, and i-mod rhymes good with i-Pod too) so there will not be any problem naming it. The real problem will arise stuffing functionality in to it – what to add and what not!

My i-Mob (with the size that can comfortably fit in a beautiful lady’s palm) must have these capabilities –

  • Dual band (CDMA/GSM), GPRS enabled mobile phone so that I can live with the big Indian war on the mobile-spectrum.
  • PDA capability with Windows CE / Palm OS, Blue tooth enabled. (I need to check my mails every three minutes and update news feeds every 2 minutes.)
  • Professional Camera and cam-carder with mini DVD recorder built in. ( – Why Picasa and Flickr are free for?)
  • AM-FM-WorldSpace Radio with in built speaker – I eat-drink-and-sleep music. More variety, more better.
  • Video / MP3 Player. Stereo FM transmitter
  • Built in TV Tuner card (Now-a-days beautiful ladies can’t live without Saas Bahoo Serials, and gentlemen without BigBrother live shows)
  • Scalable, hot swapable 20 GB Flash memory.
  • Pull-out-able swiss army knife set (No gentleman on the Earth can live without one)
  • Powerful Flashlight (Indians like me need this most)
  • Personal Air ionizer, glass-water purifier. (Very must for the people who remain always on the go)
  • Electric Shock gun (Originally meant for sparingly use by beautiful ladies, but may rescue gentlemen too from some rare incidents)
  • Electronic Mosquito repellent
  • Detachable Ball Point pen that can write both in paper and in PDA’s Portable word document.
  • Scanner (can work through camera) and Mini Printer (so that I can print my hand-deliverable-leave application on ‘sticky paper ribbon’ to paste them later on an A-4 paper)
  • Miniature LCD projector – capable to project 17” bright color image on any flat white surface.
  • Never need a battery (or external power supply). Environmental friendly – can draw its needed power from ambient light, vibration, noise pollution etc.
  • Diamond studded rim with 100% pure Platinum body (for status symbol, idiot.)

OK, I think, this is enough. I can add functionality of a mobike on my i-mob – for the sake of filling spaces to reach 700 word count, but then, I need to carry my i-mob on my back which I certainly don’t want. Will ya?

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